Ways to Thank Your Mother and Mother Figures

By Rebecca Padgett-Frett

With Mother’s Day around the corner, moms are likely on your mind. Whether it’s your mom, grandma, stepmom, mother-in-law or mother figure, there’s likely a very special woman who is highly involved and influential in your wedding. While your wedding day is primarily about you as a couple, it’s also a period of time to show even more love towards those that you love. Below are examples of ways to show gratitude towards these wonderful women before, during and after the wedding.

1. Involve Her

Whether your mom is your partner in planning crime or prefers to be largely hands off, there are ways to involve your mom that complement both of your needs. Whichever means and methods you find work best for your schedules and levels of involvement, it will be meaningful for your mom to know she was thought of. It will help the two of you bond during this unique and special time in both of your lives.

1. Spend Time Together

Especially during the thick of planning, it can be easy to lose sight of anything else. Be sure to spend time together that doesn’t revolve around planning or where the primary point of conversation isn’t wedding details. Consider making it a weekly ritual to do something together. If you live close, have a meal together, take a walk or find an activity you both enjoy. If you live a considerable distance apart, take a virtual fitness class together, have a Zoom happy hour or find a show you both love and recap together.

1. Notes of Gratitude

Letter writing is a lost art that is always appreciated when done thoughtfully. At any opportunity, express your gratitude, especially in written form. You don’t have to wait until after the wedding. Send a thank you or thinking of you card whenever your mom crosses your mind. She will delight in seeing your thoughts on the page.

1. Spa Day

We know you need and deserve one — your mom likely does too. Whether it’s in the middle of planning or the week before the wedding, take some time to let the stress float away by indulging in a spa day together.

1. Gifts

Whether it’s a small token of appreciation right after your engagement party or an elaborate thank you gift after the wedding, your mom will appreciate the gesture. You know what best fits your mom, whether it’s a gift card to her favorite store, a wine subscription, a cooking class, flowers, a new coffee maker or something more personal.

1. Personalization

Think of personalized ways to include your mom that she and others will notice. At my own wedding, I had a display set out that included my mom’s wedding dress, her gloves, her shoes, her Bible and her ring bearer pillow. It was like a shrine to her that my guests could acknowledge. I also gifted both my mom and grandma tri-fold frames with their wedding photos and a third empty frame where they could put a photo of my wedding alongside theirs. Many wedding days tend to revolve around the father/daughter relationship, but they don’t have to. If you want, have your mother walk you down the aisle or have a first dance with her. There are no rules, you make them!

1. Photos

Take photos at every possible moment. Don’t just save the photos for your wedding day. Get that camera ready for engagement parties, dress try-ons, tastings, venue tours, bridal showers, the rehearsal dinner and more. You will be so grateful to have these memories captured with your favorite lady. On your wedding day, make sure your photographer knows to get plenty of photos with you and your mom/mother figure. Once the wedding is over, put all of these photos together, and give them as a gift to forever remember.

1. Include a Thank You at the Wedding

This could be done via the wedding program, a card placed at each table, a sign or a speech. Whichever method you choose, your mom will feel over the moon to be thanked publicly on your wedding day.

1. Day Of Accessory

You get your best girls all decked out in matching robes and earrings, why not do the same with your mom? If the matching pajama shorts aren’t her style, get her something similar that still lets her know she’s included. If your mom doesn’t get ready with you, instead gift her a beautiful pair of earrings, a necklace or a stitched handkerchief. She will love being included in the day, especially with a meaningful, wearable keepsake.